Dear Mr. Fear

4 Winning ways to overcome fear.


    About 87 years ago, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, gave the nation some of the best advice anyone could ever receive. “The only thing we have to fear is … fear itself.”

Fear is the biggest roadblock to happiness and success. The question is, how do you gain command over fear, especially in uncertain times?

According to the wise Stoics: Focus on what you can control and ignore what you can’t.

What can we really control? Our thoughts, words and actions. We have control over whether we become well informed and solution-oriented or we allow outside influences, news, social media, negative thinkers, to drive us to irrational behavior.

Let’s take a look at winning ways you can turn fear into fuel and use it to gain momentum in your life’s journey, no matter what.  It all begins with…

How do you respond to fear?

It’s been said, it is not the thing we fear but fear itself that is the problem. More specifically how we handle fear. For some people fear is motivating, for others it creates a state of stress and paralysis. Some people overcome fear and thrive while others freeze.

Therefore, the thing that you fear is not actually the object of your fear, say spiders or failure, but your reaction to the fear itself. How you deal with it is most important in melting fear away.

Control your “What if”

Often, when people are fearful, they are fearful of possibilities that haven’t even occurred. They’ve allowed their thoughts to run wild in the land of “what if” negative possibilities. These scenarios often play out the gloom and doom of the worst outcomes that could happen to whatever the situation may be.

As a result, you feel more fear. Fear of things that haven’t happened and most likely never will. To overcome your fear, you must get control of your thoughts. Stop creating things to be afraid of.

Consider pondering…

Start a daily practice of self-reflection. It’s an excellent tool to use for understanding and identifying your fears and your reactions to them.

Self-reflection can also help you elevate self-confidence in your abilities, which can help you overcome fear as well. If you begin with some inner analysis, you may find that you’re not even afraid, to begin with.

Question your thoughts…

One of the greatest ways to challenge fearful thoughts is to look at evidence that proves your fearful thoughts wrong. This will also change your reaction to that fear because you will know the fear is unwarranted and unfounded.

The National Health Society of the UK recommends that you find statistics and evidence that prove your fear is unfounded. Knowledge is power. This is a great way to get over fear faster and manage emotions associated with the fear that is holding you back. 

Use positive affirmations…

Stay focused on positive, good feeling thoughts. Your self-talk affects your mood and experience. If you like, you can use the following suggestions for starters:

  • “Every challenge that comes my way elevates my confidence and knowledge.”
  • “In every moment, my life is filled with opportunity.”
  • “I choose to live my life within the context of my highest vision.”

As for myself, the way I combated my fear was by making it my best friend. I decided, since we were going to be together -I’m only human- why not become better acquainted. 

So I wrote a short poem that went something like this…

“Dear Mr. Fear, I know you’re here. On my way to my dream, be my friend, hold my hand, walk with me.” 

Fear is part of our humanness…

Fear is also very manageable. Can changing how you think about fear make you happier? Yes. When you change your mind about how you perceive fear, you also change how you respond to fear.

Take command of your thoughts, words and actions and you will thrive in any environment under any circumstances. Simple, yet not so easy? Yes, I know this first hand…but isn’t a challenge a wonderful way to grow and expand?

I leave you with…

A final thought to take with you. According to my mentor Jack Canfield, co-creator of Chicken Soup for the Soul, fear is not real, the word itself proclaims:

FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.  

If you have any questions on anything I shared in this post reach out for a complimentary conversation with me.  I will answer your questions and help you turn your happy on.  Simply click on the red button just below.


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